Do you know what is awesome? When your son climbs into bed with you at 4 in the morning and then, after tossing and turning for an hour, decides he wants his dad to take him back downstairs (Simon’s apparently the designated carrier – probably because I actually told Jack yesterday, “Sorry, mommy can’t carry you, I have girl arms, ask your father.” Yes, I did, I am ashamed and also, a lying liar.)
But more awesome than that is when they went to go downstairs, I took that moment to use the toilet and suddenly Jack was standing in front of me in the dark, covered in blood and shouting, “Oh no, I have a nosebleed!” Which is how I ended up stuck sitting on the toilet, shoving toilet paper up my kid’s nose at 5:00 a.m. My day was bound to be great after that. (Also, parenting is super glamorous.)
The nosebleed incident led me to land on the one downfall to Jack’s little hand – his small thumb is perfectly sized for optimal nose-picking and then bleeding because he can get it up there so far. This led to the following conversation I wish had never happened:
Me: “Jack, you need to stop picking your nose so this doesn’t happen.”
Jack: “But I was just so hungry.” [yes, yes he did say that]
Me: “And you really need to stop eating your boogers.”
Jack: “I just can’t help myself.”
Me: [Sigh]
Please send chocolate. And coffee.
What on earth is with boys and boogers?!! And why does everything happen when we are on the toilet?? Truly. I hold court more often there than ever in the van or sitting room
grrrrrr.
This is made me laugh so much. Boys will pick their nose even when they are men